Last January was the hardest month of my year. I made one social media post reflecting on what that month held, and I used the word “brutal” to describe how January 2025 went down. For me, that was no exaggeration. It really was.
The new year meant the reminder of grief and experiencing new grief. I had new losses and, in a sense, said goodbye to a way of life I was well familiar with, as well as one that I was hopeful for.
As people reflected on their 2024 and began sharing goals accompanied by motivational memes, my heart was crushed. My mind was stretched. While the world screamed goals and success, I was just getting by. And it’s OK if all you do in January 2026 is just make it through. Can I say two things? God’s got this, and I’m so proud of you. So, I write this blog post to the year-ago me, and to anyone else who may be facing this new month and new year with sadness or suffering instead of having a spring in their step.
This January, I’m in a very different place: situationally, vocationally, and emotionally. But my body is feeling and remembering the crushing weight of January 2025. As I continue my own processing, here are some things that helped me navigate last January. If you are now navigating your own brutal January, I pray my reflections can be beneficial to you.
The three verses that stood out to me the most were Isaiah 55:9 and Psalm 103:11&13.
“For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” – Isaiah 55:9
“For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love towards those who fear him.” – Psalm 103:11
“As a father shows compassion to his children, so the LORD shows compassion to those who fear him.” – Psalm 103:13
In January 2025, the Lord led me through unknown circumstances that I knew I could not face or handle on my own. His faithfulness brought me peace, even in the tumultuous situations.
He was with me. He is with us.
He loved me with a steadfast love. He loves us with a steadfast love.
He was my comfort. He is our comfort.
He was faithful. He is faithful.
He was my peace. He is our peace.
Every day last January, I prayed that I would do the difficult things before me honorably. It was a fervent prayer of my heart. Not so that I’d “look good,” but I know when you’re squeezed by stress and weighed down by your little world, it can result in messiness and unintentionally (or intentionally) hurting you and people around you. I wanted so very much for my heart to remain open and not abrasive before my Lord. And I wanted my mind to be fixed on the Author of clarity instead of being clouded by confusion from all the factors at play in that brutal, pivotal month. And when January 2025 came to a close, I can’t tell you how grateful I was – even to this day – that the Lord truly helped me to walk honorably. Not perfectly, no. But far better than I could have dreamed because of my continual reliance on Him. Him – the source of my peace, the caress for my comfort, the conductor for my clarity.
I never felt strong that month. I never felt like I had it all together. I had no clear answers to the variety of situations I was facing. One year later, I still never got that perfect “bow” that tied up all the messy ends. And although I wrestled with that for a time, I am at peace with it now.
Getting through brutal months requires less of us than we think, but it also requires all of us. Less of us because no amount of buckling up and being strong got me through. All of us, because when we fully rely on the Lord, that is when we see the profound truth unfold of 2 Cor. 12:10, “When I am weak, He is strong.” What I remember from that month last year is very little about me, and much about Him. It wasn’t any amount of my own work that got me through. My daily prayer of doing things honorably was a daily ‘re-surrender.’ And although taxing beyond what I feel free to share, starting my year with no option BUT surrender and reliance was the greatest position I could have been in, and is the greatest position we can begin any year.
So, my friend, if January 2026 is a brutal month for you, then I’m sorry. I’m sorry that you suffer as others tout success. I’m sorry for your grueling days as others dream of goals. I’m sorry that your resilience is being tested as others share resolutions. But I am not sorry for this one thing. You can experience the kindness and care of God in new ways that will deepen your walk with Him. And for the next eleven months (and beyond), you have a season to look back on that was not just brutal, but one that you know you didn’t go through alone. In this new year, we may be weary, but He is faithful and always worthy of our worship.
Blessings on your New Year!
